HAVING NOTHING TO SAY
My transition from Lagos, Nigeria to Newark, New Jersey was anything but seamless. As time went on, I became a satisfied victim to everything around me, and I decided to make the most of it. This is to reveal to everyone that no matter what age you are or what drastic changes life throws at you, you can choose to either pout about it blaming everyone else, or you can embrace it, and learn to make the most of the situation. Even though I struggled for a while, I now enjoy the changes I notice in my life and myself. I am propelled by the vision that continues to motivate my energy to succeed.
Having Nothing to Say
Having nothing to say is like having nothing to write.
Having nothing to say is like having nothing in sight.
Having nothing to say is like looking at a starless night.
Having nothing to say is like hearing the wind blow through a kite.
Empty and ambitious-less.
Having nothing to say makes you feel unreasonable.
Having nothing to say is like watching T.V. without cable.
Having nothing to say, for me it’s never stable.
Having nothing to say, for me it’s like being disable.
Now it seems like I’ve changed my mind.
It seems like “Having NOTHING to say” says a lot.
Satisfied Victim. Suliat Olusanya. 2012.
The first time I started to write for myself was at the age of 12. My capacity for a short story at the time was too novice for me to feel comfortable expressing myself with short stories. I decided poetry was the way to go. I wrote Having Nothing to Say when I first realized I was changing from a very outgoing, confident child to a more timid child that started stuttering and second guessing herself. It had never occurred to me that I could open up to someone about how I was feeling. Nigerians tend to bottle those types of deep feelings in. In the image above, we were celebrating my book launch, which coincided with my dad’s 60th birthday bash week. Left to Right (Bukky, Kemi, Kaoli, Olori, Me, Funmi)
I was young, my rhymes were simple, and my experience with poetry was limited, but I knew I liked the ones I came across. Throughout satisfied victim you can hear my attempt at confidence peaking through the words. I was working on being more confident in myself. Today, I am proud of how far I have come, but I still have a long way to go.